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Thursday, December 01, 2005

We Are Family

Because I am a black-belt shopper, I am almost done my Christmas shopping, but that isn't stopping me from going to a Girls' Weekend shopping trip to the outlets in Rehoboth this weekend. My sister and her sister-in-law live in/near Delaware, and this will be a nice opportunity to shop, eat out, drink and be away from testosterone levels (and in their case, children) for a day or two. Plus I will get to drive my shiny new car on a big highway!

At some point during the trip, I'll have to break it to my sister that we can't attend the big family Christmas do on the 26th, because my husband's family is having one on the same day, and we missed theirs last year, plus we did Thanksgiving at my folks' house this year. My notoriously anti-social brother is already not attending (the day after Christmas is apparently not a work holiday for him, but this is no surprise as he only gets one week of vacation per year). I feel bad, but I'm hoping that some of the family will come by on Christmas Day, which we've decided we're going to spend in our own damn house. I feel like I have to lay the ground rules now, because otherwise all the family members will bitch and moan - my mother in particular keeps a mental score card of such things and is quick to point out unfair practices. How does one handle these things? I was single for so long that being with my parents over Christmas became de rigueur, and now I worry that they're going to find themselves all alone for Christmas. But that's probably a silly fear - one of us will have them over, and everything will be fine. Right?

6 Comments:

At 3:45 PM, Anonymous SJ said...

Dang, I am jealous of your mad shopping skillz. I am just getting started!

 
At 8:25 PM, Blogger Shrinking Violet said...

Okay, you are right! You must put the boundaries up NOW!! Otherwise, you will have no credibility in the face of unfair practices. I have found that not over-talking the situation is best. Small, succinct sentences that don't invite argument. It has worked wonders for me. Also, I love that you use VIRAGO in your profile!!! A bunch of my friends nicknamed themselves years ago. What a HOOT!

 
At 9:32 PM, Blogger wordgirl said...

Well...uh....hmmm. I'd love to say that it will all work out. But it doesn't...always. It's very, very difficult to segue from following your Parents Holiday Traditions to making Your Own Holiday Traditions.

Typically, there will be some resistance to you calling the shots about where and when you'll celebrate Christmas. Wailing and gnashing of teeth. And don't forget the sackcloth and ashes. Parents have a hard time actually allowing their adult children to do a 180 on their stale plans for celebrating. Do it anyway. They'll never know you mean business , otherwise.

Then meet them in the middle. Ask THEM to come over to your house. Or...consult ahead of time with the sibs so that SOMEONE always has Mom and Dad over. That way no one gets left out. It's like a game of hacky-sack...where Mom and Dad get passed around and no one is the wiser for it.

 
At 5:23 PM, Blogger Ran said...

Oh the luxury of fighting about spending time with family. It's just me and my parents, the rest have died (grandparents) or live in a foreign country.

 
At 3:00 PM, Blogger Misfit Hausfrau said...

I loves me some outlets in Rehoboth!!! I go there for an annual Girlie Weekend and that is where we shop before we head home.

 
At 3:28 PM, Blogger Mrs. Harridan said...

My sis has a place in OCMD, so we go at least once a year. This time the original plan was to go to Lancaster (near where sis #2 lives), but she was otherwise committed.

It can be nice to see the horse & buggies after Christmas shopping to out you in the Currier & Ives mode.

 

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